1. Have you ever sit down and think about your future? Your ambition? Your real life soon? What are you going to be in the next 20 years? Will you achieve your dreams? Will you make people look high on you? Lastly, Will you make your parents proud of you?
2. I always try to remind myself that, my parents have sacrifice lot of things to me. They sacrifice their money and effort to school me and just simply to show me that you must strive to achieve your dreams and ambitions. Every year there always will be "I'm going to study hard, this year" But, this quote is just a quote. Action speaks louder than words.
4. When you got bad results for your exams, of course someone will go "tu lah, tak belajar. Asyik ber-Twitter and ber-Facebook je. Study diketepikan"
I don't mean to be so exaggerate, but I really, really hate this sentence. It really piss me off. I know I don't perform on my exam, but shouldn't you be consoling and telling me to do better next time? I tremendously hate when my uncles and aunties underestimate me. I know they thought it is a joke but it is offensive and it really offended me.
"next year, PMR kan? Boleh buat ke?" - You can't even see the future and yet you underestimate my ability. I don't understand the point of saying that especially when I'm in front of my parents and cousins. I don't understand your motif of saying that. Is it a joke? I don't think so. Were you going to give encouragement for me to study hard? I don't think so. Were you underestimate and judging on how I'm going to act and perform on my exam? Yes, definitely.
5. If you got 7 or 8As in your PMR, will you go to boarding school?
It is a tough decision to make. No one likes to be in boarding school. No one likes to be left out in the family. No one wants to be far apart from the family. To see that my parents really wanted me achieve my dreams, really urge me to study in boarding school. As I said, they sacrifice everything for me. I know I mustn't let them down.
Mom: "You must go to boarding school time Form 4. Be like your brothers and sister. Dia orang semua berjaya, but Ina tak. Dia orang semua pergi asrama but you don't. That's why you must perform. Pergi asrama. You must be like them"
Dad: "It's okay if you don't go to asrama but you must work hard"
Really, this is a tough decision. My brain says, this is for my own good, I must go. I must make my parents proud of me just like my siblings did. I must fulfil their dreams and hopes for me. Meanwhile, my heart says, you will suffer there. You'll be treated like a prisoner. You don't have the freedom to socialize. You'll miss your home, parents, siblings, your mom's cook and you will definitely miss your school days and your weekends moment.
6. Sometimes, I just can't follow my heart. This is what my parents want. This is what my mom's dream. I have disappointed them before and I know I shouldn't be repeating that, any more. To think that they have done so many great things to me, I know I have to fulfil everything they want. I got to follow my brain. I have to go. I must go. I got to go. I should go. I need to go.
7. They wanted me to success in life. They wanted me to be what I wanted to be. They wanted me to have a good life, in the next 20 years. I know, I shouldn't have let them down. I know I should make them thought that all the things that they have done to me is worth it.
8. But this is something I mustn't let go. This is my only chance to prove that, I'm one of my family members who is finally success in life.
-'sorry, i'm not perfect'
