1. My life. Define my life. First moment im feeling all pumped for the year, feeling extremely grateful for the things surrounding me and the next moment, everyone completely disappear. They left for no solid reasons. And they keep on pointing fingers to me. And im the one who has to put the effort that seemingly pointless to everyone's point of view. My life, so far has been such a disappointment. I wish i could end my 2014 with the people that i love. But how can i end my year if the one that i loved most is the one who left me first?
2. I wish people are more serious in keeping promises. I wish they value the word 'i promise you' more. I wish they just think before they broke their promises. Some people need to open their closed-eyed for once and see how damage i am, how torn i am, how broken i am.
3. I hate how people use "it's different now" as an excuse for them to get away. To get away from their lovers. Because it is so hard to use the word "i dumping you" "im cheating on you". It is so hard for them to use that phrase because they dont want to look evil but they do now. Some just dont think of others' feelings. They dont take a second to just think of everything they are doing. To be able to fight for this, is not worth it. At the end, im the one who is hurt, still.
4. For some reasons, friends are not friends anymore. They are not being supportive. Friends, in my point of view are the ones who will stand up for you when you have energy to do so. They are the ones who will voice out for you when you cant even say a word for yourself. But to my disgrace, friends now are just friends who think they can choose both sides. Fake. Utterly disgusted by their act. They failed to understand, or even notice the crash of my heart. And they have the energy to stand up for themselves. Disgusting.
5. Friends dont judge. Physical judgements are meant for jokes. People end up with suicide because of the bully "friends" are putting. People end up having the disease of anorexic or obesity because the judgements they get every single fucking day. Non stop. Comparison with the ones who are much more compelling and the ones who are just so-so is such a naive. You dont compare. You dont fucking compare.
6. But im no one to those eyes. Not even attractive. Have a flat body shape. Awful attitude. If i were to be a slave, no one would ever look at me.
-done.
